Christmas Letter

So, I was looking around at various church websites to get some ideas in regards to expanding ours and I came upon a sermon. One sermon was talking about the story of Jesus' birth and in it was a humorous Christmas letter. I can't help but share...ENJOY!

Dec. 25, 0001

It’s been quite a year for us. Maybe you’ve heard the news already through an angelic visitation (does that happen to everyone or just to us?), but we have a baby boy who’s just celebrating his first birthday. Things didn’t quite work out the way we hoped—Mary got pregnant before our wedding day and I almost called the whole thing off. But this guy Gabriel (he said he was an angel) convinced me this was part of God’s plan, so we stayed together and eventually tied the knot.

The timing could have been better: just when Mary was ready to deliver, the Emperor decided the whole world should be registered (more unnecessary government bureaucracy if you ask me), so we had to travel from Nazareth to Bethlehem. Old Bessie (our donkey) has a few miles on her, so we were pretty nervous about the long trip, but it had to be done. Poor Mary was really uncomfortable in her ninth month, and then—wouldn’t you know?—so many people had come back home to Bethlehem that we couldn’t find a place to stay. Guess I should have called ahead for reservations, but we were pretty busy praising God and trying to wallpaper the nursery. At least we knew it would be a boy!

I knocked on the doors of all my old classmates (it was great to see all of you again, by the way), but no one had an extra couch. We finally had to settle for a stable, and let me tell you it made Motel 6 look like a palace. I will say the ox and ass were a welcome change from Grandpa Zach’s snoring. Don’t tell Grandma, but we had to use a manger for a crib when Jesus was born. Just when we thought things were settling down, a pack of local shepherds showed up and---you guessed it---more angels. Then there was a lot of singing (woke Jesus up, just when we had gotten him to sleep) and then the shepherds went out telling everybody about our baby. Mary kept hoping no one would come and visit us while we were still in that stable that smelled to high heaven. A few weeks later we made the 10-mile trip to Jerusalem so Jesus could be presented at the Temple, and I have to say Simeon and Anna did a beautiful job giving him a blessing. Finally I got back to work at the carpenter shop in Galilee, and there were a lot of orders waiting—you all know how crazy Passover can be.

I don’t have time to tell you about a bunch of wise men who came along later, because right now we’re packing again---this time to go to Egypt. It looks like we may need to hide out for awhile thanks to Herod and his administration. The good news is we were able to trade in Bessie for a hybrid—much better mileage and plenty of room for the baby in back. If things continue this way for us, I think somebody should write a book!

Love, Joseph, Mary and Jesus

The story of Christmas is a divine comedy.